I can safely say that it was not a very good weekend. I had good intentions going into it. Weekends for us is usually work but on saturday we were giving a workshop and afterwards I went out for dinner with a friend in a new restaurant. It went allright at first: I had scallops as a starter and catfish as a main. There was a bit of fennelsauce which probably didn’t have any sugar in it but than for dessert we had the options of lots of sweets. I thought to go with a safe choice and had the cheeseboard but of course that was accompanied by fig bread and o a glass of port wine… Sigh. And yes I had it all.
So than Sunday… Again I did allright during the day but when in the supermarket I bought a bottle of wine and a bag of salted cashewnuts. Than I had to shoot a special chicken dish with chips. And it would be a waste to throw it in the bin so that is what we had for dinner. And we topped it of with wine and nuts.
To make matters even worse I had to shoot a breakfast with oats today. So I came up with a recipe for fruits with a crumble of oats, nuts and cinnamon. With coconut yoghurt. I had asked the husband to get me coconut yoghurt but he accidentally bought the sugared version. Guess what I had?
And to make matters worse I ended the evening today by eating the other half of the bag of chips. I did have a healthy dinner with veggies and salmon but that doesn’t help if you end by eating the bag right? So mad at myself…
What’s with that weird self sabotaging?? I don’t really want to and yet I do. I want to get healthy and lose weight and yet I do these things… It’s almost the never ending story of my life it seems. It’s “funny” in a way as you can actually look back at the years gone by and every once in a while you’ll see a blogpost moaning about how I need to lose weight and blablabla.
Sick and tired of myself really. Time to get my act together and stop fucking it up everytime. I have a difficult job when you want to lose weight, being around food all day long but that can no longer be an excuse. I mean: yes I have a friend come over tomorrow and we’re gonna be cooking all day but that doesn’t mean I have to eat it all, right?
So instead of moaning about it and beating myself up about it… I just need to get on with it. A day lost but that doesn’t mean that all is lost…
Better habits in the making!